The most politically incorrect song lyrics
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No Classroom … which ABBA hit wouldn’t pass the PC police if it was released today?
Source: Supplied
ONCE upon a time you could sing about (really) young love, kissing your teacher, casual domestic violence and killing your girlfriend and no one flinched. Here’s a bunch of old songs that wouldn’t get past today’s more politically correct ears.
ROD STEWART — Tonight’s the Night
A No. 3 hit in Australia in 1976, even at the time some radio stations found the blatant sexual overtones in this song problematic. Throw in the ‘virgin child’ reference for extra eww factor. The songwriter: R. Stewart. Watch the video below if you’re unsure what Rod’s referring to with his spread your wings and let me come inside metaphor.
Suspect lyrics: “C’mon angel, my heart’s on fire, don’t deny your man’s desire, you’d be a fool to stop this tide, spread your wings and let me come inside. Don’t say a word my virgin child, just let your inhibitions run wild, the secret is about to unfold upstairs before the night’s too old.”
THE KNACK — My Sharona
No. 1 everywhere in 1979. But behind that timeless riff it’s lyrically a creepfest. The Knack’s Doug Fiegler was 25 when he met 17 year old Sharona Alperin, who he’d later have a relationship with. To make things murkier Fiegler once clarified he wrote the lyrics from the mindset of a 14 year old boy.
Suspect lyrics: “Never gonna stop, give it up, such a dirty mind, I always get it up for the touch of the younger kind.”
Cut to the chase … Rockin’ Rod never messed around.
Source: News Corp Australia
GARY PUCKETT & THE UNION GAP — Young Girl
Where do we start with this 1968 hit? It’s a man hitting on a girl under the age of consent and then looking for praise that he’s managed to keep it in his pants.
Suspect lyrics: “Young girl, get out of my mind, my love for you is way out of line … you led me to believe you’re old enough to give me love, now it hurts to know the truth. Beneath your perfume and make-up you’re just a baby in disguise. and though you know that it’s wrong to be alone with me that come on look is in your eyes. So hurry home to your Mama, I’m sure she wonders where you are. Get out of here before I have the time to change my mind, ‘Cause I’m afraid we’ll go too far.”
ABBA — When I Kissed the Teacher
In the pantheon of student/teacher songwriting this falls somewhere between To Sir With Love and Hot For Teacher. It was totally innocent back in 1976, there’s even a video where Agnetha gives the geometry teacher a few cheeky pecks on the cheek. But imagine trying to get this on the radio now, especially given ABBA’s lyrics were written by the male members of the band. ABBA also had further retrospective grief seeing that their movie stars a pre Hey Dad Robert Hughes, now in jail for child sex offences.
Suspect lyrics: “One of these days gonna tell him I dream of him every night, one of these days gonna show him I care, gonna teach him a lesson all right.”
THE CRYSTALS — He Hit Me (And It Felt Like a Kiss)
Dat title. Carole King wrote this 1962 hit with husband Gerry Coffey after their babysitter Little Eva (she sang Locomotion) told them she was being beaten by her boyfriend but believed the abuse demonstrated he loved her. King has since disowned the song, but it has a lot of fans, from Courtney Love (Hole covered it) to Amy Winehouse to Lana Del Rey.
Suspect lyrics: “He hit me and it felt like a kiss, he hit me but it didn’t hurt me, he hit me and I knew he loved me. If he didn’t care for me, I could have never made him mad, but he hit me and I was glad.”
THE BEATLES — Getting Better
It’s on Sgt Peppers, yes, but there’s some abusive lyrics on this sung by Paul McCartney but written by John Lennon. That happy ending doesn’t make them any easier to listen to.
Suspect lyrics: “I used to be cruel to my woman I beat her and kept her apart from the things that she loved. Man, I was mean, but I’m changing my scene.”
Fight club … Turns out John Lennon wrote some pretty regrettable lyrics.
Source: News Limited
THE BEATLES — Run For Your Life
Another of John Lennon’s lyrical lowlights, pointing out that as he is jealous of his lady being with another man she better toe the line, or the only option is death.
Suspect lyrics: “I’d rather see you dead little girl than to be with another man. Baby, I’m determined, and I’d rather see you dead.”
JOE TEX — I Ain’t Gonna Bump No More (With No Big Fat Woman)
Mr Tex, who was no male model himself, complains in this 1977 disco smash about being hit on by a larger lady. She even bumped him on the dancefloor and hurt his hip. Boo hoo.
Suspect lyrics: “If you want to dance find you a big fat man. Somebody take her, she’s too big for me, she’ll knock me down. Leroy, you can have this one dude, this big fat woman, I don’t want her.”
DR HOOK — A Little Bit More
Top 10 in 1976 and a love songs and dedication staple. But some people find those lyrics a touch Bill Cosby.
Suspect lyrics: “When your body’s had enough of me, and I’m laying flat out on the floor, when you think I’ve loved you all I can I’m gonna love you a little bit more.”
JACK JONES/FRANK SINATRA — Wives and Lovers
A Bacharach and David tune from 1963 that won Jack a Grammy and was covered by Frank a year later. It is, let’s just say, of its time. A chap tells a woman just because her husband put a ring on it she should not let herself go because there might be a hot chick at work and, you know, men will always be men, so you better put out as soon as your husband comes home.
Suspect lyrics: “Hey little girl, comb your hair, fix your make-up, soon he will open the door. Don’t think because there’s a ring on your finger you needn’t try any more. For all wives should be lovers too … I’m warning you, day after day there are girls at the office and the men will always be men. Don’t stand him up with your hair still in curlers, you may not see him again, wives should always be lovers too, run to his arms the moment he comes home to you.”
DID WE MISS ANY OTHER POLITICALLY INCORRECT GOLDEN OLDIES? TELL US BELOW
THE FOUR TOPS — Ain’t No Woman
It was 1972 and men believed women should hang on their every word.
Suspect lyrics: “I would kiss the ground she walks on, ‘cause it’s my word she’ll obey now.”
JIMMY SOUL — If You Wanna Be Happy
A huge hit 1963, the premise here is that if you marry a pretty woman she’ll break your heart, and if you instead opt for an “ugly” woman with mismatched eyes she’ll be so grateful for the attention she will prepare your meals punctually and be eternally grateful to you for lowering your aesthetic standards. Bill Wyman recorded a cover of this song in 1976, a man, let us not forget, who had an `80s hit with a song containing this lyric “They’ll think I’m your dad and you’re my daughter” just a few years before marrying Mandy Smith, who he started dating when she was 13 and he was 47. Classy.
Suspect lyrics: “A pretty woman makes her husband look small and very often causes his downfall, but if you make an ugly woman your wife you’ll be happy for the rest of your life, an ugly woman cooks meals on time and she’ll always give you peace of mind.”
Hey ladies … Marc Hunter sang Are You Old Enough, often in front of hormonal teenage girls.
Source: Supplied
DRAGON — Are You Old Enough?
BACK when this Oz/NZ band hit No. 1 in 1978 with this song it courted controversy for the title alone. Throw in some of the lyrics and it’s either an ode to jailbait (sung by a protagonist who’s just spent “ten year’s in the jailer’s eye”) or just really misunderstood. When the band played it on Countdown after singer Marc Hunter (who lived the rock lifestyle to the hilt) asked ‘Are you old enough?’ in the chorus teenage girls in the audience shouted “It’s all right” and “you can trust me”. You crazy kids.
Suspect lyrics: “Are you old enough for love?”
BENNY MARDONES — Into the Night
A big hit in 1980 and a great tune, apart from those troubling lyrics.
Suspect lyrics: “She’s just sixteen years old, leave her alone, they say. Separated by fools who don’t know what love is yet … I’d take you into the night and show you a love like you’ve never seen.”
SANDY POSEY — Born a Woman
This 1996 hit inspired Helen Reddy to write I Am Woman. Reddy called it a ‘doormat song’ due to lyrics which claimed that “no price is too great to pay” to be with a man.
Suspect lyrics: “A woman’s place in this old world is under some man’s thumb, and if you’re born a woman you’re born to be hurt, born to be stepped on, lied to, cheated on and treated like dirt.”
THE ROLLING STONES — Under My Thumb
Speaking of misogyny, Mick Jagger has stated these lyrics he wrote for the 1996 hit are not “anti-feminist” and instead the song was aimed at a “pushy woman”. The lyrics see him turn the woman into his subordinate, turning her from a ‘squirming dog’ to a ‘Siamese cat’.
Suspect lyrics: “It’s down to me, the way she does just what she’s told. Down to me, the change has come. Under my thumb, her eyes are just kept to herself, under my thumb, well I can still look at someone else.”
Thumb nailer … Mick Jagger says Under My Thumb isn’t anti-feminist.
Source: Supplied
THE ROLLING STONES — Stray Cat Blues
Old mate Mick again; he wrote this for 1968’s Beggars Banquet album, reportedly from the view of a man lusting after a 13 year old girl and inquiring whether her mother knows how she screams and scratches.
Suspect lyrics: “There’ll be a feast if you just come upstairs, but it’s no hanging matter, it’s no capital crime. I can see that you’re 15 years old, no I don’t want your ID.”
Before Buddhism … the Beastie Boys were once badass.
Source: News Limited
MUNGO JERRY — In the Summertime
A global No. 1 in 1970, an era where you could say “have a drink, have a drive” in a song — ironically this tune was used on a drink driving campaign ad in the UK. But that’s not the worst message contained within.
Suspect lyrics: “If her daddy’s rich take her out for a meal, if her daddy’s poor just do what you feel.”
BEASTIE BOYS — Girls
They’d later disown their sexist years but this captures the Beastie Boy in their pre-Buddhist phase.
Suspect lyrics: “Girls to do the dishes, to clean up my room, to do the laundry, and in the bathroom two at a time, I want girls.”
THE MONKS — Nice Legs Shame About the Face
The word is that this UK 1979 hit was a demo that was never meant to be heard. It was.
Suspect lyric: “Met her on a blind date … he said she was good looking. when I saw her there she was a real disgrace, I thought nice legs, shame about the face.”
CHARLIE DRAKE — My Boomerang Won’t Come Back
A novelty hit in 1961, produced by future Beatles guru George Martin, that also topped the Australian charts in 1962. However one line had to be tweaked …
Suspect lyric: “I’ve waved the thing all over the place, practised ‘till I was black in the face …”
THE CURE — Killing an Arab
Inspired by an Albert Camus book, this 1978 song continues to create controversy due to the title, with The Cure now changing the lyric to ‘killing another’ when, or if, they play it live.
Suspect lyric: “Staring down the barrel at an arab on the ground, I can see his mouth open but I hear no sound. I’m alive, I’m dead, I’m the stranger killing an arab.”
Trouble lover … Axl Rose managed to offend multiple people within one song.
Source: News Corp Australia
GUNS ‘n ROSES — One In a Million
Oh Axl Rose, you rebel. This made headlines in 1988, which Rose loved as he managed to offend an array of people all at once. He’d later point out he was OK with some gays, including Freddie Mercury and Elton John. What a top dude. Maybe Reclaim Australia should use this in their rallies, now they’re running out of tunes?
Suspect lyrics: “Immigrants and f—-ts, they make no sense to me, they come to our country and think they’ll do as they please, like start some mini Iran or spread some f—–g disease, they talk so many goddamn ways it’s all Greek to me.”
AC/DC — Big Balls
We could have picked plenty of songs from Bon Scott’s unique canon, try Squealer for example, but let’s just go with the `70s Benny Hill-style swagger of Big Balls.
Suspect lyrics: “My balls are always bouncing, my ball room always full, and everybody comes and comes again … Some balls are held for charity, some for fancy dress, but when they’re held for pleasure they’re the balls that I like best.”
ELVIS PRESLEY — Kissin’ Cousins
It was 1964 and families were super close in America, it seems.
Suspect lyrics: “I’ve got a gal, she’s as cute as she can be, she’s a distant cousin but she’s not too distant with me. We’ll kiss all night, I’ll squeeze her tight, but we’re kissin’ cousins and that’s what makes it all right.”
Why Why Why … Step away from the knife, Tom Jones.
Source: News Corp Australia
TOM JONES — Delilah
SIR Tom still busts out this 1968 monster Delilah to this day, heck, he did it at the AFL Grand Final last year as part of a medley with his non-murderous hits. Despite telling the story of a man stabbing his partner to death, it won the Ivor Novello award for Best Song Musically and Lyrically the year after its release. When a politician tried to get Delilah belatedly banned in 2003 for its domestic violence content lyricist Barry Mason said “Nobody listens to the lyrics.” Eddie McGuire said it was “inappropriate” to sing the song in 2014 after last year’s Grand Final. Although Nick Cave killed Kylie Minogue with a rock in the lyrics to Where the Wild Roses Grow and that was hailed as an artistic statement, so …
Suspect lyrics: “As she deceived me I watched and went out of my mind … At break of day when that man drove away I was waiting, I crossed the street to her house and she opened the door, she stood there laughing, I felt the knife in my hand and she laughed no more.”
