Rock City’s 14 Oz Albums of ‘14
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The Peep Tempel – Melbourne garage punk pop band who kick your ar$ e sideways. Pic by Kate Griffin
Source: Supplied
BEST 14 ALBUMS OF 2014 – IT’S A THREE WAY TIE FOR FIRST
Caps lock n load, we’re going in.
Equal 1. The Peep Tempel – Tales (Wing Sing)
The Peep Tempel – Tales
Source: Supplied
Why it rules: It punches you in the guts with its rhythm section, slaps you across the face with a slapped (no pick!) guitar, grabs you by the ears and shakes your head half-joking, half-menacing, half-cut. The Drones finally have contenders in the category of Raucous ‘Strayan Live Act.
If it were a movie/TV show: Idiot Box Vs Chopper.
The words that maketh murder: “And all these little things seem superfluous in the grand old scale of time.”
Best enjoyed with: A good hard look at yourself.
Equal 1. C.W. Stoneking – Gon’ Boogaloo (Caroline)
Gon’ Boogaloo – CW Stoneking
Source: Supplied
Why it rules: It’s proper EDM: Eccentric Dance Music. The Pale King returned (sober) after six years, wriggling like an electric eel with eclectic feel. The colourful character from the ‘20s-not-the-2000s has always been more 45rpm than MP3 and now he’s jive talking over blues, Dixieland, Doo Wop, Calypso, Motown and all kinds of ballyhoo. On a technical/cerebral level, Dave Faulkner summed it this near-perfect record perfectly here. Fun fact, CW’s real name is: Stanley Rogers.
If it were a movie/TV show: Treme
The words that maketh murder: “Those primal drums, this loud guitar, it heralding this sound near and far, don’t second guess me doing my thing, don’t underestimate, I’m the king”
Best enjoyed with: Rum n cola, dancing around the house with your baby and your babe-4-lyf Kashia, most Friday nights in ’14. Get on the floor and start to rock!
Equal 1.Seekae – The Worry (Future Classic)
The Worry – Seekae
Source: Supplied
Why it rules: Now with vocals. Now taking over the world. 4.5 star review in residentadvisor. What thee worry? Keep calm, oxen calm.
If it were a movie/TV show: Sneakers.
The words that maketh murder: “Today is not your day”
Best enjoyed with: A sly grin.
4. #1 Dads – About Face (Pieeater)
Why it rules: Tom Iansek knows how to write pop hooks, make the mundane magnificent, give you all the melancholy pop you never knew you wanted/needed. Also, reclaims the hashtag for its original purpose. #respect
If it were a movie/TV show: Heartbreak High.
The words that maketh murder: “I’m a slave to the change that’s in my pocket.”
Best enjoyed with: A blue heaven milkshake.
5. Chet Faker – Built On Glass (Future Classic)
Why it rules: He’s a space cadet, a soul surfer, a guy that did a left pivot when everyone went right. Nick Murphy got his heart crushed and then crushed it on his debut LP. Helps to have Andrei Eremin on board too aka. The Best Engin-ear(s) in Melbourne. Kudos to any Australian artist who can sell 16,000+ in his first week too.
If it were a movie/TV show: Basquiat.
The words that maketh murder: “We used to be friends, We used to be inner circle, I don’t understand, What have I become to you, Take my good word, Turn it backwards, Turn your back on me.”
Best enjoyed with: Future Classic’s bartab.
6. Guerre – Ex Nihilo (Yes Please)
Why it rules: Every time you get close to this record, Lavurn Lee slips through your grasp, becoming violet plumes of smoke, all prac, no theory, all relative, can you relate?
If it were a movie/TV show: Baraka.
The words that maketh murder: Words? Hard to comprehend. All the feels though.
Best enjoyed with: Mineral water and deactivated phones.
7. Collarbones – Return (Two Bright Lakes/Remote Control)
Why it rules: Simple. It goes from partaaaaaay times on Turning straight into Soldier, the woozy post-trap track of the year that makes all your limbs jelly and your heart devoted to whoever the mystery suitor Marcus Whale is singing about.
If it were a movie/TV show: Captain Planet.
The words that maketh murder: “Don’t you know I love the way, That I’m turning me, You make me feel like someone new.”
Best enjoyed with: A safe trampoline, double-bouncing friends.
8. King Gizzard & The Wizard Lizard – I’m In Your Mind Fuzz (Flightless)
Why it rules: Stu MacKenzie has vowed to learn a new instrument every year. On Hot Water he plays the flute like Keef plays guitar. Also, they had a killer year overseas and recorded this sucker in the Daptone Studio in Brooklyn.
If it were a movie/TV show: Bargearse.
The words that maketh murder: That flute says more than words ever will.
Best enjoyed with: The slab that Bon Scott drunk.
9. REMi – Raw X Infinity (House Of Beige/UNFD)
Why it rules: REMi Kolawole has emerged a fully formed star, ravenous for success. This record takes aim at the ice epidemic, apathy, ignorance, Eddie McGuire and Australia’s Most Read Columnist but does it in an intellectual, progressive way. Class act.
If it were a movie/TV show: Higher Learning. (REMI reference 
The words that maketh murder: “So your Boss can get some new Beamers? F— that ar$ ehole, If he wants a Castle, Then tell him he’s dreaming”
Best enjoyed with: Sangria, of course.
10. Nun – Nun (AVANT! Records)
Why it rules: It’s the wake-up call you need. Don’t mean to alarm you but this record is the Best. Alarm. Ever.
If it were a movie/TV show: The Mighty Boosh, Future Sailors episode.
The words that maketh murder: “Time is running out.”
Best enjoyed with: Eight pints of Carlton Draught then three ‘tater cakes from Platform One at Flinders St station.
11. Tom E Lewis – Beneath The Sun (Skinnyfish)
Why it rules: Lewis is a journeyman from Arnhem Land, a love rustler, a good fullah, an actor (Jimmie Blacksmith no less), an activist with an active imagination who knows actions speak louder than words. Above all, Blacksmith is a tunesmith.
If it were a movie/TV show: The Chant(s) of Jimmie Blacksmith.
The words that maketh murder: “White ones for the English, red ones for the Welsh, green ones for the Irish and nothing for the Celts.”
Best enjoyed with: A good cry.
12. Krakatau – Water Near A Bridge (Trouble In Mind)
Why it rules: They’ve invented druid-core. Getafix would getafix of this LP.
If it were a movie/TV show: Picnic at Hanging Rock.
The words that maketh murder: Instrumental as anything.
Best enjoyed with: Closed eyes. Sensible shoes. Mugwort in a pipe.
13. Laura Jean – Laura Jean (Chapter)
Why it rules: Laura Jean lives to serve two things: the song and her kelpie. Not in that order. You can’t argue with those priorities. This is like listening to Drake for the first time, revealing to the point where you don’t know where to look.
If it were a movie/TV show: Her (but set in the ‘60s)
The words that maketh murder: “You just made a film in which you asked your best friend to hit you in the face again and again.”
Best enjoyed with: Scritching a dog’s neck.
14. Augie March – Havens Dumb (Caroline)
Why it rules: Every song has a beginning, a middle and an endgame. These tracks have been thought, over-thought, then pared back to the kernel, Sanders.
If it were a movie/TV show: The Road.
The words that maketh murder: “The same smug expression, same false cheer, Same air of predation, “Stranger welcome…” just not here, just not here, just not here.”
Best enjoyed with: a bottle of Laphroaig and a phonecall with someone you haven’t chatted to for years.
AAAAAND THE WORST THREE
Architecture In Helsinki, Now +4EVA (Modular)
As mawkish as its title. Sadly.
Now + 4Eva – Architecture in Helsinki
Source: Supplied
Bloods – Work It Out (Tiny Galaxy)
Rushed effort.
Work It Out – Bloods
Source: Supplied
Frowning Clouds – Legalize Everything (Rice is Nice)
Directionless until the second half of the record where it gets pretty good.
Legalize Everything – Frowning Clouds
Source: Supplied
Hit up @joeylightbulb on twitter with your opinions and disagree/agree profusely. Gwaaarn.
Originally published as Rock City’s 14 Oz Albums of ‘14
www.news.com.au/entertainment/music
